Defined by God, Not Humans

Yesterday on my Facebook page I shared a meme about the impact of growing up in a dysfunctional or abusive home on the ability to make decisions, even small ones. With that meme, I also shared two things I have personally used to overcome decision paralysis because it is a very common struggle for folks. …

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Strategic Chaos

God will put us in blessed places.That doesn't mean they are always easy.Sometimes a blessed place is a hard place or a chaotic place.It also doesn't mean blessed places are for us to get something that feels good to us.It means there is something about us that needs to be put into that messy situation …

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Really, the Holidays are Happy

I have considered deleting my post from yesterday about the holidays and being tired of grief because, once again, I evidently didn't communicate well. The point that I was trying to make is that holidays for a lot of people come with all the emotions, and I know people who are stuck in their grief …

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My Personal Strategies for Moving Through Sadness, Change, and Hard Life Places

Venus McFly fascinates me. My post today from my personal Facebook page... In the last few days I've had multiple conversations about depression and grief, and I thought I would share some of my "wisdom" here, too. First, when my husband moved out, mom died, husband died, stepfather blamed me for Mom's death, brother went …

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What is Your Name: Who Has the Right to Decide

Last week I finished the series on Family Predators and left Friday hanging with a post asking, "What is Your Name?" In that post I said, "Your name isn’t what people call you. Your name is what you live into. What is your name?" In that moment I was thinking of my name and the …

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Family Predators: What You Can Do, Part 8

Throughout my series on Family Predators, I've talked about family predator culture and its impact on one's personal life. In today's final post of the series, I want to look beyond survival and escaping to changing the story. In previous posts I said I stopped enabling family predator culture in my life by confronting my …

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Family Predators: Things I Want You to Know, Part 7

For more than a week I have been discussing the family predator culture, how it continues, how to heal, why people leave. I have shared part of my story and other people's stories, but today I want to talk about your story. If you are a victim of the predator victim culture, there are things …

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Family Predators: It Stops with You, Series Part 6

In part four of this series, Family Predators, I talked about why it is hard it is to walk away from family predator culture. However, I know quite a few people who have done it, including myself, and with my friends' permission, I would like to share why and how we walked away. For a …

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Family Predators: How Did You Heal?, Series Part 5

I have considered not writing this because I don't want to oversimplify this subject. I have written from my experience, and I know others who have hell stories because of their family's predators--yes, sometimes more than one--and their family protecting those predators. I want to respect their stories and their healing journeys which are more …

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